Life with Hope

momandhandFrom the age of 15 something just “happened” one day. I became more aware of my body and the opposite sex. I ran away from home at 16 to live with a man who was physically and emotionally abusive for 3.5 years. I lived in so much sin and guilt for leaving my family behind in turmoil, I’d wake up screaming in terror at night.

For those 3.5 years God pulled and tugged and did everything he could to bring me back to him. He used everyone but I ran as far as I could across the country. It was useless. I was lonely, broken and just destroyed physically by 19. I had an eating disorder and was cutting, smoking, doing drugs and the “love of my life” had just cheated on me.

Satan consumed my thoughts one night in May 2012 and I tried to take my life. I woke up 3 days later in a hospital feeling worse then I did before. My boyfriend would visit and every day when he’d leave, I’d be crying feeling worse about myself. I had given up all hope and just wondered why I was even on this earth. Why had God let me live? I was useless to everyone around me! I had failed my family and I was in a relationship that I couldn’t get out of.

4 weeks later God gave me Hope. As soon as I found out I was pregnant, my first words were a prayer, “Lord this is not my child, SHE is yours.” I hadn’t prayed in years but in that moment I felt so much Peace surrounding me it was undeniably God comforting me. I just knew she was a girl from day one.

Unfortunately that very same night, my night took a bad turn. As soon as my ex came home, he begged me to have an abortion. I refused and because I wasn’t giving in, he tried to punch the baby out out of my stomach. It was the last straw. God had His arms around me when my ex was on top of me. I literally remember the Father surrounding His love around my tummy and protecting Hope.

The next morning, after 3 years of squandering my life and trying to do it MY way, I called my mom. Within 4 hours my Dad flew up to Chicago and drove myself and everything I owned to Texas. Since that day, July 7th, 2012, my life has completely changed. I’m no longer the slave to sin I used to be. God replaced that daily feeling of emptiness with Hope. My daughter is the light of my life & I would NEVER change my past to live a better life. God gave me the story for a reason and I’m encouraged daily by how far I’ve come!

I will never go to bed alone, & I will never have to deal with the feeling of loneliness anymore. I have God in my heart and Hope on my side and that’s all I need.

God provided complete restoration in my family and now I just want to plant seeds by sharing my story. I am the Prodigal Daughter, I ran and lived in the world, but my family still came back for me. I hope my story encourages you to realize that there is hope no matter what situation you are in. God will ALWAYS provide a way out if you are living in sin. Because He wants to see His children following Him!

God gave me so much strength to have Hope. Pregnancy doesn’t run well in my family, my grandmother died during childbirth and my mom and myself almost died when I was born at 29 weeks. One night, I was all alone at home just having a weak moment in my heart and I just cried out to God asking for Him to rescue me. That’s when Jeremiah 29:11 came to mind…but more specifically, “I’ve GIVEN you Hope” and right then I knew I was having a girl and everything would be JUST as God planned. Hope Anne was born on March 8 2013, 5 days LATE and perfect at 6 lb 15oz. I’m continuously reminded everyday about how God loves us like we love our children, and that I have Hope and a future.

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares The Lord, “plans to prosper and not to harm you, plans to give you HOPE and a future.” {Jeremiah 29:11}

Written by Danielle Harrelson {Embrace Grace alumni}

One thought on “Life with Hope

  1. This was beautiful! I’m so blown away by His grace and it gives ME hope that I will always have God in my heart and faith surrounding me. I’m so happy for all that he has done for you!

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