A vow of Purity

I am 22 years old.

I am single.

I am a mother.

I am a hard worker with a full time job.

I am completely on my own.

I AM SO HAPPY.

My baby boy is the best thing that has ever happened to me!

I grew up in a Christian home but it wasn’t always a perfect life.  By the time I was 14, I was totally putting on a show for everyone around me, including myself. I had my “good” friends that I would hang out with some days, and then I had my “bad” friends I would get into trouble with some days.  I was living a double life between God’s way and the worldly way. By my 16th birthday, I was in a world of a mess. I had already lost my virginity and hated living at home. I did everything I could to escape reality even though it was myself that I felt the most unhappy about. I ran away from home at least 3 times throughout my teens. I just keep finding myself in trouble over and over, sleeping with anyone that would say the right things to make me feel noticed and wanted, and even had to struggle with the pain of being date raped. My life had spiraled out of control.

In November of 2009, my world completely changed in one moment.  I didn’t immediately realize that I was pregnant, even though I had so many signs that pointed to the obvious.  When I finally had the courage to take the test, it confirmed what I already knew deep down to be true, I was pregnant. Every possible emotion washed over but the main feeling I had was worry and fear. I had no idea what I was going to do and I I just knew that my parents

When I had my first doctor appointment, I found out that I was not only pregnant, but I had another surprise that came along with my unplanned pregnancy, I had STD’s. I took some meds throughout my pregnancy to tackle the ones that were treatable, but the doctors said that the big ones would be a scar of my sins forever.

On, August 4th, 2010 I was blessed with the most beautiful baby I had ever laid my eyes on.  He looked perfect in every way. Every thing I had gone through in life up to this point, was nothing compared to the joy and love I felt in that moment for my son.

Shortly after birth, I found out that my HPV STD had turned into cancer. I had never been so scared in my life. I prayed and cried a lot. All I could think of is that I would die and I wouldn’t be here to raise my son. I begged God to heal me and to remove this STD and make me whole and new again.

I went in for surgery and was SO nervous at what they would find. I just had to put all my faith and trust in God that He was going to take care of me. When I awakened, the doctors came in and said that they completely cleared out all cancerous cells and that she her body was healthy. She had no trace of STD’s and got a clean bill of health!  It was like a fresh start on my life. I was ready to put the past behind me and just look ahead to all the new and awesome things my God has in store for me and my son.

One of the decisions I have made since all this happened, is to stay pure until I am married. It has been SO much on my heart lately and I will be making a covenant with Him in a couple of days to seal my decision. I want to give my whole heart to my husband on my wedding day as a gift to Him. I want to stay pure for my God who loves me more than I can ever even understand. I’m SO excited about this journey God has me on right now. Sometimes, it might seem hard and it might seem long but I am happier when I am in God’s plans instead of my own.

John 8:10-11 (MSG)- Jesus stood up and spoke to her. “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?”

“No one, Master.”

“Neither do I,” said Jesus. “Go on your way. From now on, don’t sin.”

Written by Emily Robbins

4 thoughts on “A vow of Purity

  1. Emily-your lIght shines SO brightly! You are an extraordinary mother, you are a wonderful friend, your a leader, a servant and a giver!!! You are a tremendous blessing to EG and we are all so extremely grateful to have you in each of our lives! Thank you for sharing your heart!

  2. Emily I love you so much and you truly are a blessing! Thanks so much for being transparent and sharing your story. So excited for the places God is taking you. You are God’s pearl and He loves that you are taking this vow of purity with Him. You are a remarkable mommy and your little Gavin lights up when He sees your face! He loves his mommy so much!

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